7 Things You Should Never Say to a Bride on Her Wedding Day
Planning a wedding is one of the most stressful times of a woman’s life. Most women have been dreaming of this day since they were little, and this event is bigger than any other party they’ve ever hosted. There is a bridezilla lurking in all of us, and it is guaranteed to make an appearance if a guest mentions any of the following 7 phrases.
1. That _____ looks just like so-and-so’s!
Whatever you fill in the blank with – dress, centerpiece, ceremony arch, wedding ring, etc. – keep the thought to yourself. No bride wants her wedding to be “ordinary.” Every bride strives to be unique, original, and one-of-a-kind. To hear that you’re wearing the same dress as a bride did at a wedding earlier in the summer or that your decor resembles another wedding is not a compliment and is guaranteed to upset the bride. Instead of saying, “Haley had that at her wedding, too! I loved it!” simply say, “Popcorn bars are so fun and trendy! I love that you went with that feature.” It’ll make the bride feel proud instead of embarrassed.
2. Don’t freak out, We have a problem, or any variable of the likes.
Everyone knows that when you say not to do something, they’ll do the opposite. It’s human nature. If you tell a bride not to freak out, she will 100% have a panic attack thinking about the worst situations that could happen on her wedding day. If you notice any crises or problems that need to be handled, alert the maid-of-honor, wedding planner or consultant, or parents of the bride. It is okay, though, to tell a bride if there’s a problem. Just don’t phrase it in a way that will concern the bride. If you do feel the need to tell the bride what is happening, make sure you have the solution or how it’s being handled to ensure she doesn’t freak out.
If there is an issue that the bride is panicking over – like a tear in her train or a missing centerpiece – do NOT say “No one will even notice.” The bride has worked extremely hard making sure that every detail of this wedding is absolute perfection. For you to suggest that no one will notice the hours of hard work she put in to bringing every detail together will infuriate her and most likely hurt her feelings. Offer a helpful solution, instead.
3. Is that how you’re wearing your hair/doing your makeup?
Whatever you do, please don’t imply that the bride looks anything other than ravishing on her wedding day. While you may feel like you’re being a good friend – after all, wouldn’t you want to know if you looked awful at your wedding – it’s guaranteed to hurt the bride’s feelings and possibly affect her entire day. Again, the bride has worked extremely hard on every aspect of this wedding. Odds are that she had test trials for her hair and makeup and decided on which look she loved. She most likely hired professionals who she trusted. You putting doubt into her mind about how she looks right before she walks down the aisle to marry the love of her life is not what she needs. Focus on an element that you do love – like the highlights in her hair or the how long her lashes look – and comment on that, instead. Make her feel beautiful; not inferior.
4. Why didn’t you…?
Starting off ANY sentence with these three words is a major no-no on the day of the wedding! It doesn’t matter how the sentence ends – invite so-and-so?/ask so-and-so to be a bridesmaid?/serve chicken?/have a bouquet toss? Because the answer cannot be changed, just don’t bring up the question. Trust that the bride had her reasons and it’s her wedding, so it should be done the way she wants. Don’t question her and make her second-guess her opinions.
5. Any comments regarding how much the couple spent
Just like it’s rude to ask someone’s age or weight, it’s also rude to say “How much is this costing you?” Whether you’re saying it in a derogatory way – like Wow, this looks so cheap. How much did it cost you, $5? – or in an impressed and adoring way – like Wow! This chandelier is incredible! How much did that cost?! – just wonder silently to yourself. No need to ask out loud and risk embarrassing the bride. Everyone has a different budget and will spend it the way they see fit.
6. When are you having children?
Just…no! That is not your business! Starting a family is a huge commitment and it’s a very private decision! The bride and groom may not have even had the discussion yet on how long they want to wait before starting a family, and your question will just make them uncomfortable. Also, starting a family is not mandatory for all married couples. The bride and groom may have decided they don’t want children. Either way, it’s their decision and you’ll be made aware of it when they decide you need to know.
7. Don’t mention that you don’t like one of their vendors
It’s too late for them to fire and rehire any vendors, so don’t bring up any bad experiences you’ve had in the past with any of their vendors. They don’t want to panic about potential crises or envision any problems that could ruin their day. Let their experience be their own and allow them to form their own opinions. If you have heard absolutely terrible things about who they’re considering hiring tell them before the wedding. You can absolutely warn them or mention these kinds of things before the wedding so they have the best day possible, but DO NOT bring it up when it’s too late to change anything – i.e. the wedding day. One easy way to avoid this? Use Today’s Bride’s trusted vendors, committed to creating the best weddings in Northeast Ohio!
If you’re in the wedding party, here’s a guide for the Do’s and Don’ts of the wedding day. As a guest, simply stick to wishes of love and happiness, comments on how beautiful the couple is/the wedding turned out, and sharing any appropriate and flattering stories or memories of the bride or groom. Don’t make the happy couple regret inviting you to their celebration. Be respectable and considerate to the couple, party, family members, and other guests when making conversation, and you’re sure to have a fun and enjoyable experience!